How to Break Up with a Possessive Boyfriend

If you are involved with a jealous/possesive person it is time for you to reconsider your relationship. This is abuse. Learn to recognize the signs of abuse. Then take the next step and decide to put a stop to this controlling relationship.

Steps

1. Everyone has problems in life. First you need to make sure if this possessiveness is really the kind of person he is, or if situations in life have turned him into this person.
2. If you care at all for this person beyond the possessiveness, tell him honestly and openly that you are your own person and he can either drop the possessiveness and treat you like a human being, or you will be forced to move on.
3. If needed, take some time apart to recollect your thoughts and determine if this person is fundamentally someone you want to spend your life with or if you are only a slave to the possessiveness.
4. Make yourself aware that this controlling behavior is a sign of an abusive relationship. Learn to recognize these signs.
5. Decide to end the relationship. As you become aware of the harm being caused to you, decide to get more information on what help is available to you to change your situation. This is your decision.
6. Gather information and seek support about who can help you with your different needs.
7. Plan your exit. Create a safety plan and choose a place to go if needed.
8. Take action. Just leave. Cut off all lines of communication. You owe this person nothing. Actively engage your support networks and seek any help you need.
9. Prepare for your future. Allow yourself to dream of how your life will come together and make a plan to achieve these goals.
10. Take some time for yourself. A time to heal. Now that you are settled into your new life, it is time to think about how this ordeal has affected you and heal. When you are happy within, when you learn to love yourself and enjoy life - only then will you be able to find meaningful lasting relationships.

Tips

• Open up to people who are expressing concern for you like your friend, family member, your doctor, your neighbor, or your minister. Reach out.
• Do not lose sight of yourself. It may seem overwhelming at times. Your future begins with you.
• Only you can restore happiness, peace, and balance in your life. You are a valued and necessary member of your family, community, and society. Don't be afraid to believe in yourself!

Warnings

• Jealousy and possesiveness are signs of an abusive relationship. Abuse is abuse whether it is mental or physical. This controlling behavior only gets worse as the relationship progresses.